One of these is for the body, one is for the mind, and one is for the spirit. I try to employ all of these in my daily life although not always successfully. When I do, I find they are quite effective.
For the mind: self-care. This is taking baths with luxurious products, dressing up just for yourself, setting up date nights for just you and maybe some girlfriends with good food and maybe champagne. This is getting your hair and nails done, going for a walk in the park, working out or keeping your space clean. You want to recharge your emotional batteries, physically enjoy the life you live, so when life is difficult, it isn’t quite so draining. This isn’t a time to worry about having a certain body type, adhering to hustle culture, or trying to live up to unrealistic standards.
For the body: breath work and slow communication. A lot of feminine coaches will tell you to speak slower to be perceived as more feminine. This is for purposes of social acceptance. What I would add to that that they usually don’t is that you want to also speak from the diaphragm. When I am anxious or upset I have a tendency to speak very fast and from the throat, which is where a lot of women speak from. This is called up speak. If you slow down and speak from the diaphragm, you find that anger or anxiety turns to power, that people will better listen to you and are more likely to agree to what you have to say, and will perceive you as more assertive. Our deeper intuition is rooted in the solar plexus chakra which is right by the diaphragm. And I find explosions of anger or aggression are very shallow in their roots in your body, making them unstable. Up speak is great to soothe your best female friends during a bad break up. But when dealing with a world that wants to force its will on you, it’s better to speak from a deeper place of power. also making your language more direct and less equivocal, not overly apologizing or using verbal pauses, is a great way to govern an interaction in your favor. Learning how to properly project the way a vocalist does is helpful with this. You don’t want to breathe from your shoulders, you want to breathe from your stomach region. And projecting isn’t making your voice higher, it’s using deeper breath to throw it farther. All of this is an antidote to how we as women are taught to make ourselves smaller and more digestible to those around us.
For the spirit: rule your domain. A lot of feminine energy coaches will tell you that we should be about rejecting hustle culture and having soft lives. This usually trails into commentary on how we need leaders and protectors. And this is where I diverge. We can have those soft lives if we set strong boundaries and rule our domain. We narrowly define the things we want and we do not permit people or environments to introduce energies that corrupt those desires. We only take in to our spheres of influence those people and things that will align with our goals. When we don’t allow society to dictate what we should desire, beyond using it as a sort of browser to find those things, we aren’t trapped in a cycle of chasing Everything we are supposed to want and then failing ourselves. I want specific handbags, a specific make up style, train travel, enough cash to buy a nicer apartment preferably near a public beach. I don’t care to have a socially acceptable body, a perfectly attractive partner, or excessive wealth. This is what I mean. It’s partially about shedding baggage, partially not begging for scraps, and partially dictating what is allowed to influence your choices and worldview. The way I see it is, you can be a queen on her throne and accept gifts of quality, or you can sit on the floor and take only what falls from a table where those who want your worship sit and feast. You deserve your own throne. And you can build your own table with your own people.
Just remember that the feminine within you is like the sun, it gives life. You project but not in a shallow cheap aggressive way, but in a deeper way that illuminates everything. Respect yourself as the center of your universe, but also respect that everyone else is the center of theirs. Learn how to validate things you don’t understand and see new concepts as equally worthy of consideration as what you have been taught. Welcome to the path.
Solaria Divina 